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Thread: ANTM6 - Episode 7 - Queens of Krump

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    ANTM6 - Episode 7 - Queens of Krump

    ANTM6 ? Episode 7 ? Queens of Krump

    Let me ask you something folks. Have you ever felt like no matter what you did, it was never good enough? Tried your best and it STILL wasn?t good enough? Marched your butt down that runway of life with enough stomp to kill every one of those nasty roaches from that Jared Gold fashion show? That my friends, is what happened to another one of our lovely models last week on the April 12th episode of America?s Next Top Model 6. She was all that and a bag of chili cheese Fritos, she took great pictures, she had a natural charisma in her Cover Girl commercial, and she was a favorite of many to win. However, she just couldn?t ?.walk. Not even a gratuitous, topless dip in the Jacuzzi could save Leslie from the cold, cruel chopping block that is the elimination ceremony.

    By now, most of you have either already watched the show and sat around over pizza, Big Macs?, burritos, and beer arguing over how so in so is SOOO fat, SOOO ugly, and SOOO boring that you simply can?t comprehend how ?she? (insert model you can?t stand) is still in the competition over the lovely Leslie. But let?s just take a little trip down memory lane to jog your memory as we begin to dissect this fierce little frog of a show, shall we? The show opens with Jade crying like a little beyotch.
    Yes my pretties, Jade was crying. There must have been onions on the menu that night for dinner, because we never see that side of the ?Undiscovered Supermodel?. Brooke, however, must have had other dinner plans that night and decided to stop by her local golden arches for some McBitchy with cheese instead.
    She is pissed off about Nnenna laughing at her when she messes up and going around calling her a crybaby to other people. Brooke informs us that she is nice, but has a temper and doesn?t think Nnenna likes her, but then again, she doesn?t like Nnenna either?.so booyah!

    Striptease

    The next morning the girls meet with Miss Jay to learn to take their clothes off. He shows them how to work with various accessories while on the runway. He teaches them how to unbutton their tops with the maddest skillz (remember start at the bottom and work your way up gurrrlfriend! *snaps in z formation*). They also learn how to peel off long, sexy gloves and swing their long skirts and veils like a sexy medieval fantasy. Young Suzie Miller in Topeka, Kansas throws down her pencil in disgust and knocks her Calculus book off the bed. Screw derivatives! Screw college! I am becoming a model! She jumps on her bed, puts on some Ying Yang Twins and proceeds to shake it like a salt shaker as she flings a glove across the room hitting her little Pomeranian in the forehead as she screams ?TO THE WINDOOOOOOOW?..TO THE WAAAALL!!?
    Our Glamazons don?t quite have quite the same level of krunkness as Young Suzie, as Leslie does horribly even admits that her walk is the worst of the bunch. Brooke drops her purse as Nnenna cackles at her from the sidelines. Sara gets chastised for trying to make herself look ?smaller? and Miss Jay compares her to Gumby on a bad day.

    Dizzy Up The Girl

    The Ying Yang Twins aren?t the only twins to make an appearance this ANTM Recap Experience. The models are sent away to meet with Richard Harris and Ron Harris, the ?Aswirl? twins. Instant first impression? Joanie describes it best with ?Count Dracula meets a hairdresser?. They speak with the strangest accent and tell us how they taught ?Tarrrrra? (i.e. Tyra) how to do the swirl back in the day. The dynamic duo teach our ladies how to spin around dramatically and flamboyantly to glamorously show off their long dresses. Joanie has a grand old time but trips a bit. Furonda gets too funky with her bad self and makes it into more of a dance than a swirl. Leslie and Sara are stiffer than?

    Glitter pauses, an angel dressed appears on her left shoulder
    and a she-devil appears on her right shoulder.
    The angel speaks, ?Now Glitter, should we REALLY go there now?? The she-devil butts in, ?Oh come on, they make it so, so easy! Go for it! GO FOR IT!? Glitter scratches her head and thinks again.


    Le sigh?.Leslie and Sara were stiffer than a board. :D After their Swirly Session, the girls arrive back home and Pop Quiz time! What do YOU think is happening?

    a) Jade is in a confessional telling us how she is the ?Undiscovered Supermodel?
    b) Furonda is admiring her glittery ghetto crown in the mirror
    c) The producers are zooming in on a box of Special K cereal
    d) Nnenna is on the @($*!$&!$ phone?..again!

    Come on now, think hard. And no cheating!

    Okay pencils down! If you said ?d? give yourself a big ole Top Model pat on the back! Nnenna is on the phone! Everyone has about had it up to he-re with it and even Danielle tells us, ?You see the sun rise, you see it set, you see the Eiffel tower, you see the crows caw, all that going on and she is still on the phone.?

    Brooke has finally had enough and jumps up and storms into the phone room, ?How can you not understand the concept of the phone?? she tells the little phone hog. Nnenna says she didn?t see anyone waiting. Brooke retorts ?You?re a chemist, you can understand all that and you can?t understand the simple concept of a phone??
    Nnenna adjusts her top and tells us via confessional that she is not ?moved? by Brooke?s words and ?I really don?t care.? Brooke starts to tell her how she doesn?t appreciate her talking about her when Nnenna picks up the phone and flat out ignores her and starts dialing again. I KNOW she didn?t! *wags finger in the air, swings head around, smacks gum* Brooke snaps like a wishbone at Thanksgiving and storms down the hall proclaiming that Nnenna is a BITCH and ?I?ve had it up to here?everyone thinks she?s sweet, everyone thinks she?s nice, and she is not.? Ah, yes, we all know that one chick that seems to get away with all kinds of shiznit either because a) she knows when to turn on the doe eyes and stare blankly and blink like oh did I do something? or b) people are too lazy or too apathetic to deal with her, because it?s not like it?s directly affecting them now huh? (let?s just sit and watch them claw each other?s eyes out! Yeah! *grabs popcorn*) It?s enough to make any sane girl go postal. However, in Brooke?s case, the mail done came and went and she?s still spittin? out stamps!

    Jade is in the next room, half flabbergasted and half amused and tells her that ?Yo, Brooke is mad at chu!? Nnenna asks if she looks like she cares, because she doesn?t. Brooke goes back to her room and Leslie watches as she unleashes her anger ?What makes her so much better than me? She?s from Africa? (she says in a baby voice) Go back to Africa if it?s so damn great!? Brooke jumps back out of her room and yells, ?I don?t CRY! Your are a (censored) BITCH Nnenna!? and flips her off. After commercials, Brooke has calmed down quite a bit and is now feeling ashamed of her outburst. Danielle doesn?t think she should make apologizes, and if she is going wild out, she should do it ?full force? and not back down.

    And On The 8th Day?..There Shall Be Bling

    Joanie runs to get the Tyra Mail with a laundry basket on her head, you know since she is a ?basket case? *drum roll TING!* All it says is ?Sashay, chant??, lyrics from the 90?s dance classic ?Supermodel? by everyone?s favorite drag queen, RuPaul. Leslie laments how she still needs to join the Derek Zoolander Center For Models Who Can?t Walk Good But Want To Learn How To Do Other Stuff Good Too. Nnenna has managed to pry herself off the phone long enough for Sara to call her boyfriend for some TLC and reassurance that she can make it through this competition.

    The next morning, the models arrive at.?church. Nope, not Church?s Chicken (thank God, no chicken photo shoots?..urrmm yet? Maybe I shouldn?t say that. I swear if Tyra has these poor girls dress up like chickens, I will seriously have to consider picking a new favorite show.
    They meet Roy Campbell, a producer of special events and fashion shows and who has known Tyra for a long time. He informs them that this week?s competition will be a church fashion show modeling clothes by fashion designer Lloyd Klein (who steps out to meet the girls. The significance behind this, Roy explains, is that in the early 40s, black people were not allowed to go to fashion shows, so they hosted their own fashion shows in their churches, starting a big tradition in the black community. Next, Roy introduces Sol Rafael, diamond designer, who tells them that the winner of this challenge will be getting a $25,000 diamond ring. Wooo! BLING BLING!


    The girls get dressed in long black or white, slim fitting gowns and turbans to cover their hair. Here is the holy rundown:

    Danielle ? needs more personality in her walk
    Leslie ? says she is ?working my hips?and if Miss J. doesn?t like that, then too bad.? Ummm....newsflash Leslie he is one of you judges?.perhaps you should care what he thinks
    Brooke ? needs to work on her presence and is ?a bit absent.?
    Nnenna ? struts down some micro booty shorts like a diva
    Furonda ? swirls and whips her outfit around smacking an audience member, and Roy yells ?can I get a Hallelujah?!?!?
    Sara ? looks really stressed out and trips on herself several times
    Joanie ? informs us that she?s ?gonna work it out for God!?. She does a sexy, sassy, phenomenal job. She recognizes Jade as her competition on the runway and is confident she will win.
    Jade ? despite how so many of us feel about her, she hands down rocks the runway and does a spectacular job.
    She Aswirls like a pro and evokes the biggest reaction from the crowd. ?That?s what a community fashion show is all about,? Roy exclaims

    After the show, the girls gather to find out who has won the competition. Lloyd announces that Jade as the winner of the $25,000 diamond ring. She goes wild and makes a big production in celebrating her victory. Jade gets to pick a friend who will receive a $10,000 diamond ring, and chooses Furonda (WOW, I guess these two have gone from enemies to best friends now?) Lloyd tells Furonda is that she can pick a friend who will get an $8000 ring and picks Nnenna. On the way back home, Jade, Furonda, Nnenna and Leslie are in one car together, and Joanie, Brooke, Danielle and Sara are in the other car. Brooke says she doesn?t think that Jade OR Nnenna will win this competition, even if they are winning the mini-challenges. She says that, ?Just because I handle my stress in different ways than others doesn?t make me a crybaby.? Immediately after this statement, she is shown crying on the phone to her father (yep?on the PHONE! Wow, Nnenna must have been too busy admiring her ring to talk to Johnny boy this?.hour). After a commercial break, we see Leslie with Jade in the Jacuzzi with her top off, telling us via confessional how she doesn?t want to go back to Arizona, since it is ?not exactly a fashion capitol?after all I experienced here, I can?t just settle for that.? Apparently, this must be a last ditch attempt at getting some camera time and hoping she will not be eliminated if she continues to show some boobies.

    Let?s Get KRUMP Up In Herrrrrre!

    The next day the girls are taken to a rooftop of a skyscraper. Mr. Jay tries to cheer the mood up by telling them they will be modeling the ever so ?hip? and ?fashion forward? Payless Shoes! Yes, these fine shoes were inspired by runway looks and it is like so exciting huh?! He asks them what kind of photo shoot does they think it will be and Nnenna thinks they will have to leap off the building. These poor, terrified, girls?.Tyra wouldn?t make you do anything THAT scary! Why, all you have to do this week is dance??..WITH CLOWNS *thunder and lightening crashes, Tyra cackles like an evil witch in the background*

    A troop of clowns come running out and Mr. Jay tells us that Tommy The Clown and his Krumpers will be in their photo shoot and be teaching them how to move. Jay tells us that ?krumping? is ?high energy style of hip hop dance reminiscent of break dancing?. I am sure this will make for a lovely page in these girl?s portfolios. I am sure Pepe Le Pew Top Designer in France will take one look at the results of this photo shoot and be all ?Oui Oui! Voo le voo KRUMP-ING!? *slaps his knee and hires them all on the spot*
    Trevor O?Shana, is the photographer for the day, says they need to bring Tommy?s energy to their pictures and Jay reminds them to show off those Payless shoes! Leslie thinks she will do a good job, since she used to dance, and Jade is also pretty confident in her mad skillz. The girls get made up into some wild, urban, funky hair and makeup, and some downright HOOCHIE MAMA looking outfits.
    Here is the a rundown of each girl?s performance.


    Joanie ? does a good job but gets a bit mean in the face
    Furonda ? Jay tells her not to shame her black sistahs! Work it! She is a bit ?limp? (the angel and she-devil from earlier start to hover over me and I tell them both to step mmkay)
    Danielle ? Jay also tells her not to shame her black sistah. She bashfully says she is known as a ?white girl? back home and will do her best. She works it and Jay teases her for making him think she didn?t know how to dance
    Sara ? body poses are good, but her facial expressions are not
    Nnenna ? for the third time, Jay makes a reference to black/African-ness. Geez! She doesn?t really dance, but poses.
    Leslie ? only does about 2 different moves and Jay thought she would be more ?sex kitten?
    Brooke ? is soooo nervous as always, and dances provocatively, they even bring out the old stripper music they used to use for Brittany in Cycle 4.
    Jade ? goes nuts and dances like her life is on the line. She grabs a bottle of water and pours it on her all crazy. Jay is impressed and said that is something that Tyra would do.

    Back at the house, Danielle is freestyle rapping with Joanie. Yo yo yo! They read the Tyra Mail that says judging is coming up and Leslie, Brooke and Sara are the most nervous about their potential elimination.

    That Signature Strut

    The girls file in for judging. Tyra introduces the prizes and judges. The winner will receive a modeling contract with Ford, a spread in Elle shot by Gilles Bensimon, and $100,000 contract with CoverGirl cosmetics. The fabulous judging panel for tonight includes: Nigel Barker (?noted fashion photographer?); J. Alexander aka Miss Jay (?legendary runway coach?), and Twiggy (?fashion icon and living legend?). The special guest judge this week is Roy Campbell, who worked with them in their challenge this week. Speaking of challenge, this week?s judging challenge is to show the judges their signature walk. *Camile from Cycle 2 nods proudly at home* They must incorporate the things they learned this week from the church fashion but also make it their own. As an added twist, they must, as Tyra demonstrates, do a 360 degree turn as if they were a ballerina in a wind up music box, since it?s all about balance you know? Bizzare, but what Tyra wants, Tyra gets! Dammit! *Cassandra from Cycle 5 flips her the bird*

    The girls all take their turn down the runway. It?s quite predictable actually. Jade, Joanie and Furonda do well, while Leslie and Sara bomb. Brooke, Nnenna, and Danielle fall somewhere in the dreaded in-between. Tyra wastes no time getting down to evaluations. A quick comment on attire this week, as the girls look rather good today, especially Joanie in her little black dress.
    Anyway, here is the rundown:

    Sara ? They aren?t crazy about her walk and ooks like she slipped on a banana peel in her photo. Again, she needs to pay more attention to her facial expressions
    Furonda ? Is praised for having hands down, the most distinctive walk, even if she swings that arm too much! Her photo is praised all around.
    Brooke ? Her walk sucked (although Roy liked it), but they all love her photo. It?s very sexy and ethnic.
    Joanie ? They love her walk and love her photo. Mad propz!
    Danielle ? They like her walk, but it isn?t signature. Her photo is good, but not great.
    Nnenna ? They did not like her walk and tell her she needs to pay attention. They like her photo and her smile seems to be what saves her.
    Leslie ? Her walk is terrible. Her photo lacks energy and she is doing more salsa than ?krumping?.

    The Cover Girl of the Week is?.Nnenna once again! Jessica Hall of Chicago, Illinois says that she is ?the epitome of elegance? (psst and hogging the phone! Brooke whispers). After a commercial break, we see the judges quickly deliberate. It seem pretty damn obvious who the low performers are, and the photos are handed back in this order: Jade, Nnenna, Furonda, Danielle, and Brooke, leaving Leslie and Sara, two popular fan favorites, in the bottom two. This is their first time being in the bottom two for both girls.

    Sara?s critique is that she is ?awkward? and still can?t be comfortable with her height. Tyra tells her that one of the judges want to ?send her back to the mall.? Leslie?s critique is that they don?t see a model when she stands in front of them and has bad ?posture? and lack of ?presence.? Tyra turns around the last photo and it belongs to Sara. Leslie is eliminated.
    Tyra tells Sara that she must learn to ?own her height? or else it will be a hindrance. In a very tearful, but gracious exit, Leslie seems very thankful for the experience and she recognizes her faults. Her gorgeous portfolio appears on screen and her image fades away from the group photo.

    Next week on America?s Next Top Model, the girls will get the opportunity to impress an important agent, who seems quite bitchy and critical, and Joanie has major, twelve hour dental surgery. We see a shot of a giant tooth being removed *eek!*

    Apologizes on the delay of this recap, as I was brainstorming different approaches to make it even better and more entertaining for YOU. Feel free to comment, whether it be mad propz, oooh I know you didn?ts, or suggestions on what you would like from the ANTM Recapping experience. I appreciate your thoughts and feedback!

    I aim to please?..bitches.

    ~GlitterxGold, RTVG

    Images from the show were obtained from UPN and are their property. Mmmkay. Everything else came from the magical land of Google.

  2. #2
    Great recap Glitter, you had me rolling on the floor. And that perfect of Joanie is great.

  3. #3
    RTVG Idol DoeBoy's Avatar
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    I love it! WHOOP, WHOOP!

  4. #4
    great read gxg - you hit the nail on the head with this show...

    Your style and humor are perfect - don't change a thing!

  5. #5
    RTVG Idol Snowy's Avatar
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    Good Job Glitter! :D

    Time goes by fast.
    Look at the flowers go.
    Kimberly; Alison; Katarzyna

  6. #6
    Won't be anything left... Swim4life107's Avatar
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    I didn't see it got posted. I just read from the PM you sent me. I thought I was going to skim it but I got ADDICTED!! I love the new format and photos are a PLUS ++++. I love the jokes too. You have FIERCE you beyotch!


  7. #7
    Love the extra pictures for comedic effect!

    Award goes to: the Krunk pimp with the bling!

  8. #8
    Gettin up in this gig i love kahlen's Avatar
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    Cassandra from Cycle 5 flips her the bird
    ^gotta love Cassandra

    Great recap! I love the pictures, they add alot to the effect, expecially the hamburger one
    Wonderul job GxG

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