Back at the house, Nastasia is ecstatic about the Suite and invites Kiara to join her. Laura believes that Leila’s elimination is a “wake up call” and she’s determined to stay focused.
Yvonne, on the other hand, complains about the model life to her boyfriend Brandon. The hours are ‘long” and leaves her “super tired”, says the koala.
The next day, the girls are met by Rob Evans and Chrissy Tegen. The duo greets them via a game screen and tells the girls that they will be creating a motion picture for the game Uncharted 3.
Based on her intense hamstring exercises, I’m fairly confident that Victoria can fully embody any game heroine.
But it seems like she has competition. During the challenge, Kristin had an “infectious” energy, and the client loved her white-girl-dance taunt.
Brittany was also really skilled at “embodying the character”. Rob was unimpressed by Yvonne, who he thought was “flat” during the challenge. In fact, the only time she had an ounce of vigor was when she was running toward the ̶c̶a̶k̶e̶ camera.
Victoria was the “best actress” but had trouble with the physicality. Laura, on the other hand, had trouble just remembering the video game. Seriously, her performance was much better suited for…
Call of Booty
But the client still loved it. Thanks to her enthusiasm (and countless bribes from horny 14-year-old boys) the winner is…
LAURA! In addition to the $10,000 scholarship fund, she will also be featured on Uncharted 3 (as ‘Unnamed Pedestrian #3’).
After the challenge, Chrissy gives the girls a talk about social media. Her script includes such tidbits as “it’s important” and “people in the industry care about social input.” As she wraps up her lecture, she finally gives them real advice to use in their outside careers: “let them reach in and feel it.” #wordstoliveby
When they return to the house, Nastasia and Victoria are devastated to see their low challenge scores. To only further harass these girls, P’Trique rolls in and relays a Tyra Mail to these terrified women.
“The clock is ticking. Get your booties in gear. It may not be the end of the world, but it’s the wild, wild, west out there. Luv, Tyra.”
Afterwards, Victoria runs to the phone to report this assault on her visual senses. She confides in her mom that she can’t even “taste food without her there”. The poor xylocarp doesn't have her momma bird to regurgitate for her! THE HORROR!
The next day, the girls meet Johnny near a train cemetery. He is accompanied by Mike Ruiz, who is just the finest photographer we’ve had yet. They tell the girls that the theme for this shoot is ‘steampunk’. Wait, are you telling me that Johnny Wujek and Mike Ruiz are cute and know what steampunk is? Forget this shoot, I’ve already found a perfect photo of my ideal husbands.
In hair and makeup, Yvonne is annoying the other girls. Kiara is sick of her “constant complaining” and Victoria ponders Yvonne’s commitment to the competition.
Laura made “good graphic shapes” and got “a ton” of good shots. Kiara also brought a lot of intensity to the shoot but failed to provide the “right vibe”.
Initially, Brittany was really upset with Bryanboy for being unpleased with Leila’s elimination. After a brief discussion with him, she was determined to bring “variety” and “fierceness” into her shoot to avoid another bottom two appearance.
Nastasia was phenomenal and even though the outfit is doing her no favors, she looked like a character straight out of Norse mythology.
Thor: God of Thunder-thighs
Kristin, who apparently has a monkey-phobia, had trouble connecting with Groovy, the owl. Allyssa, on the other hand, did nice.
Victoria decided to create an intricate character for her shoot, which included a traveling animal circus, a boyfriend, murder, and running away with your lover/owl. Sounds like a Zoolander sex dream. Anyway, Johnny thinks that she focused too much on the backstory and wasn’t strong enough in the actual pictures.
After about 5 hours of waiting, Yvonne started her shoot. Within the first few frames, they decided to change her dress, which led to her sighing loudly. Bryanboy, who apparently thought Yvonne cares enough to insult him, gets angry and verbally assaults her.
She rolls her eyes at the screaming midget and continues her shoot. Unfortunately, she was unable to let go of the anger in her face. For the rest of the shoot, she ended up looking like an angry Hogwarts reject.
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Ire
After she was done, Yvonne decided to apologize to Bryanboy. She looked the three-foot mongrel in the eye (a difficult task) and told it that she regretted her attitude on set.
Back in the house, all of the girls are nervous about the impending elimination. After Leila’s assassination, they realize that nobody is safe.
"You all know our judges. First, we have PR maven, Kelly Cutrone. Next, we have sexy British male model, Rob Evans. We also have our social media correspondent, Bryanboy."
"You know our prizes. The winner of America’s Next Top Model will receive a fashion feature in Nylon Magazine, become the face of the fragrance Dream Come True, be offered a contract with NY/LA Models, shoot an advertisement for Smashbox, and receive $100,000.”
Kiara: Kelly describes her as a “thirty-two year-old woman” and gives her a 6. Tyra and Rob disagree, focusing on her “great legs and energy”. They award her a 7 and 8.
Victoria: Tyra and Kelly appreciate the “versatility” but feel that it’s “too safe”. Rob gives her a 6 and Tyra a 7. Since she can “take criticism well”, Kelly gifts her an 8.
Kristin: The judges admire the strong face but Kelly calls her a “waitress from Oktoberfest” from the waist down. Kristin receives an 8, 7, and 6.
Nastasia: Rob is unimpressed by her terrible proportions and deems it a 5. Kelly gives it a 7 and Tyra calls it a “short but beautiful” 9.
Yvonne: Kelly thinks it’s “not too strong” and gives her a 5. After she gives her a speech on professionalism, Tyra grants her a 7 while Rob goes with an 8.
Allyssa: Rob doesn’t like the “awkwardness” and gives her a 7. Kelly and Tyra disagree, handing her 8’s for her “beautiful silhouette”.
Brittany: Kelly is unappeased with her “ghostly” look and grants her a terrifying 6. Tyra and Rob, on the other hand, love the “mesmerizing” glare, and give an entranced 10 & 9.
Laura: The fans and judges both agree, she is “crazy good”. She receives 10s from all.
“Now the judges and I will calculate your scores and when you return, I will announce who will be eliminated.”
“Nine beautiful ladies stand before me. But I only have eight photos in my hands. And these eight photos represent the eight girls that are still in the running toward becoming America’s Next Top Model. The girl with the best score, and best picture, is…”
“Will Victoria and Yvonne please step forward? I only have one photo in my hands. And this photo represents the girl who is still in the running toward becoming America’s Next Top Model. With a score of 31.7 to 30.5, that girl is…”
Yvonne is pleased about leaving and satisfied with not trying during the Comeback.
Next week, the girls will be taking a road trip and “getting blown”. Sounds hot. Apparently, one of Victoria’s phone calls make her “not healthy”, says Allyssa’s tan.
Who do you think should have gotten best picture? Who do you think should have been in the bottom two? Do you agree with the elimination? Who would have you eliminated? Who are your faves? What was your favorite part(s) of the recap? Anything else you wanna say? Leave any and all comments below and until next week...